You Can’t Step Into the Same River Twice

Clergy Conference: Diocese of Kinkiizi

The Church in Uganda is a third generation church living in the afterglow of the East African Revival.  The Revival started in the 1930s on the hill in front of Namirembe Cathedral with two people who committed themselves to prayer.  One of the two went to Rwanda where the Revival began to spread rapidly entering Uganda through the Diocese of Kinkiizi and spreading throughout the country.  Today in Kinkiizi some of the grandparents of the current priests and lay leaders were directly affected by the revival.  The parents of our priests and leaders lived with the active memories and stories of that time; but there was another important event that marks the present church from that time, and that event was the history of the martyrdom of Christians in Uganda.


The history of the Ugandan Church began with the martyrdom of Bishop Hannington in 1885, and the subsequent martyrdom of 22 Christians.  From Universalis, a Roman Catholic Website providing the Liturgy of the Day Hours, we find the following description: “Many Christians, Catholic and Protestant, were killed by the Ugandan king Mwanga. Some of them were servants in the king’s palace or even his personal attendants. Charles Lwanga and his twenty-one companions (the youngest, Kitizo, was only 13) were executed for being Christians, for rebuking the king for his debauchery and for murdering an Anglican missionary, for “praying from a book”, and for refusing to allow themselves to be ritually sodomised by the king. They died between 1885 and 1887. Most of them were burned alive in a group after being tortured.”  In the second century the theologian Tertullian remarked that “the blood of the martyrs is the seed of the Church.”  During the reign of Idi Amin, there was another wave of martyrdoms and the Anglican Archbishop Janani Luwum, was martyred in 1977 by Idi Amin's henchmen.

The present generation of Ugandan Christians live with both the stories of the East African Revival and the stories of the martyrs.  Their faith is intensely personal and enthusiastic with many evidences of the power of God and direct experiences of the presence and anointing of the Holy Spirit, but some of the marks of Charismatic revival as it has been experienced in the American Church in the 1970s are not currently part of the experience of Ugandan Christians. There is a tendency among American Christians to attempt to revive old revivals, but you can’t step into the same river twice, nor should you try.  Instead of attempting to relive the past we should be asking, “Where does the Holy Spirit want to lead us today?”

What Do You Do When You Are Tired and Worn Out?

“…Why, I feel all thin, sort of stretched, if you know what I mean: like butter that has been scraped over too much bread.” ~ Bilbo Baggins

There have been times when I can identify with Bilbo.  He was a hundred and eleventy years old, and he had every reason to feel like butter that had been scraped over too much bread.  I suspect that most of us have been there at one time or another.

Even when you have doing your best, or perhaps, especially when you have been doing your best, that thin and stretched feeling can creep up on you.  There are several contributing factors.  Foremost among them is the fact that fallen humankind in a fallen world does not possess limitless energy.  Mind you, I think that limitless energy was part of God’s original plan in the Garden of Eden.  The curse Adam earned was, “By the sweat of your face you shall eat your bread . . . for you are dust and to dust you shall return’ (Genesis 2:19).  We run out of steam because we were meant to be connected with Life Himself, and when that connection was impaired, death, and the potential for exhaustion, entered our world.

There is another factor that cannot be ignored.  At the very beginning, that Arch Liar, the Serpent, fed Eve a bundle of half-truths.  The central fib she was told was that she could be like God by doing things in her own way, instead of in God’s way.  The only safe thing she could have said to him was, “Be gone Satan!”  Make no mistake we are still in that same battle, a battle that will take its toll on our energy, and on our very lives.  Jesus said as much when confronting the Pharisees, “You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father's desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and has nothing to do with the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44).  There is an Enemy who seeks to drain us of all life and energy.  He is the Murderer of life, love, and joy.

There is a solution.  That solution is to continually, repeatedly, return to active fellowship with the God who loves us.  Isaiah asks us, “Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary, his understanding is unsearchable.  He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.  Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted;  but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:28-31). 

The Hebrew word for “wait” also means “to hope, to expect, and to bind together.”  When we are bound together with the Lord by dwelling in His Presence in prayer, in listening for His voice in Scripture, in praise, and in fellowship with the saints, our energy gradually returns.  Experience teaches us that this restoration is positive, gradual, and energizing like the charging of a battery.

The Secret Keepers

The Church is a family with some basic similarities with any family, and an essential difference.  The parish church, gathered from many places and many backgrounds is generally a broader community than a single family.  Secret keeping can ruin families, and it can ruin churches, for secret keeping leads to loss of trust in the secret keepers.  Instinctively one knows that something is going on, and we have the therapeutic words of Jesus that what you do in secret will be shouted from the rooftops. Secret keeping in families and churches is a sign of dysfunction, and only a growth in transparency will move families and parishes towards health.

There is only one kind of secret in parish churches that should not be told, and that is the secrecy of the Confessional.  That leads to a potential priestly misunderstanding; you can’t extend the secrecy of the Confessional over the rest of the stuff in a parish, it simply doesn’t work.  Part of the reason is that people, without priestly training, sometimes are unable to handle the private exposure of the secrets of another; they simply have to pass the hot potato.  The more loaded the hot potato the more apt they are to pass it on.  But let me tell you a secret, not all priests handle this very well which is why the Book of Common Prayer advises that you find “a discreet and understanding priest”.

Secret keeping in Churches doesn’t work very well, and for several reasons, the first reason being the nature of the secrets one is trying to protect.  Secret keeping in parishes most often has to do with gaining and exercising power over others.  It automatically creates an ‘in group’ and an ‘out group’.  Withholding information from others removes the power of response, either of approval, disapproval, or action.  Incorporating unwilling people in the circle of secret keeping is an attempt to neutralize them under the bonds of secrecy, in effect saying, “Now that you know the secret, don’t talk about it.”

Because the church is a broader than an individual family, secret keeping doesn’t work very well.  If the secrets being kept hide actions that would not be taken if they were public, they contain an element of shame.  In that sense, shame is the fear of exposure.  If an unwilling person is placed in the position of keeping secrets in a parish setting they may have several responses.  Some people boxed into that situation will simply, as a matter of principle, just ignore the demand for secrecy.  Some can’t wait to unload the hot potato sometimes sharing the secrecy under the guise of sharing a prayer concern.  Some relish the power that secrecy sets up and the result is divisiveness, and yet others gloating over their power can’t resist telling someone.

Again we come to the old adage, when power comes in the door, love goes out the window; and love is the central business of Christians, especially with each other.  A wise friend of mine says that anything worth doing should be done in the open.  If you can’t do something in the open, you probably shouldn’t be doing it. 

Worry, Worry, Worry!

Worry, worry, worry, oh me, oh my, like a dog on a bone.  Have you ever observed that many of the things that we worry about are things that we can do nothing about at the time we are worrying about them?

Some of the things we worry about are matters of genuine concern, but some of them really don’t deserve the worry weight we place on them.  That reveals that there are two levels of worry.  The first level of worry is over things that may call for specific action and prayer; the second level of worry needs to be treated differently.

The first kind of worry is the subject of Psalm 107 where a pattern is established in a refrain that repeats throughout the psalm.  “They cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He delivered them from their distress.”  The word ‘trouble’ can also be translated as ‘a tight place.’  We do get in tight places, and that does call for trust and prayer.  St. Peter advises us to cast and keep on casting our anxieties on Him for He cares about us (I Peter 5:7).  Sometimes dealing with a significant worry takes persistent prayer and responsible action.

The second kind of worry is just the habit of worrying.  We human beings will worry about things that aren’t worth worrying about just because we are used to worrying about something.  The Psalmist says of some people, “There they were, overwhelmed with dread, where there was nothing to dread” Psalm 53:5 NIV). 

This kind of worrying can be managed by a simple technique. As one of the ancient Desert Fathers said, “If you have a snake or a scorpion and you put it in a box and put the lid on it, sooner or later it will die.”   A little holy repression is good for the soul.  Repress it.  Put it out of your mind.  Go watch a movie.  Read a good book.  “Whatever is honourable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Phil. 4:8). 

On a deeper level, consider the Sovereignty of God.  There is ultimately nothing that is going to happen to you that He can’t redeem.  He who created you, loves you, and holds you in the hollow of his hand. “Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His steadfast love endures for ever” (Psalm 118:1).

The Old Triangle Dance

In every relationship people dance patterns of steps they have learned, sometimes long before.  They are often surprised when their current dance partner won’t fall in line with their old patterns of dance.  The first year of a marriage is often a struggle with harmonizing the different dance patterns.  Later in the relationship, for better or worse, a new pattern is established. 

Sometimes it works.  Sometimes it doesn’t.  One partner gets furious, the voice raises in volume and pitch.  The other partner shuts down and retreats, and the pattern is danced over and over and over again; that is until one of the parties makes a change in the dance step.

Churches are no different.  Many of us come from active involvement in other churches where we learned patterns of behaviour that we expect to find in our new church home.  Trinity is essentially a new Mission congregation and we haven’t had enough time together to establish our pattern of dance steps.  However we do need to be aware of a common dance step in our past experience.  That pattern is The Old Triangle Dance.  You can read about it in Chapter Eleven of Canon Neal Michell’s book “Beyond Business as Usual.”

In The Old Triangle Dance, one member, who has a complaint about another, goes to a third party to gain leverage (power) to get things resolved the their way.  This has the tendency of making the third party into a lightning rod if others in the congregation catch on that they are open to receiving complaints.  Traditional lightning rods are Senior Wardens, Junior Wardens, Vestry members, Office Staff, and any priest or deacon who can be induced to accept lightning strikes.

Just for the record, our parish leadership is being trained about responding to The Old Triangle Dance, and our Vestry is studying Canon Michell’s book.  None of us want to wrap ourselves in aluminum foil and stand in the back yard waiting for a storm.

Well, what do you do if you have an issue?  First, and most constructive, avoid the third person approach, and go directly to the person you are concerned with.  Second, if you go to one of our leadership team they will be very happy to offer you the opportunity to speak directly to person you should be talking to.   Third, try to sort out what’s really important.  Bear in mind that some things are not worth getting worked up about.  Didn’t like a hymn?  You might be surprized.  If I picked the hymn, and it didn’t work; I may have ended up not liking it either.

There is one very essential key to communication within churches, and that is love.  When power and control come in the door of the church, love goes out the window.  Remember that you are loved by the One who gave himself for you.  Remember that he said, “Love one another, as I have loved you.”

What’s In A Name?

One wonders why parents pick certain names for their children.  What on earth was the minds of the parents who named their babies, Dweezil and Moon Unit, or how about the little girl named Aquanetta, after the hair spray, or the little Gates boy who was named Pearly by his parents?  I actually met Pearly Gates who was always invited to banquets just so that he could be introduced.  I strongly suspect that I was named after Christopher Robin in Winnie the Pooh, although I’m not entirely sure.  Certainly Winnie the Pooh loomed large in family lore, and my uncle Ian was always referred to as Uncle Eeyore.

Why was Trinity picked as a name by the founders of this parish?  I would hazard a guess that it wasn’t a reference to the Trinity River.  The simple explanation may in part be that Trinity is a very traditional Church name.  On a deeper level it has a meaning that transcends the past history of this parish.

Trinity Episcopal Church is named after the Trinity, Father, Son and Holy Spirit.  For the ancient Hebrews the name evoked the whole person.  When the psalmist says, “May the Name of the God of Jacob protect you, he means, may God, and all that He is protect, shield, and guard you.  When we say that this is Trinity Episcopal Church, we are declaring that the One God, Father Son and Holy Spirit dwells in this place; and that we acknowledge the power, majesty, and sovereignty of the Trinity, three Persons in One God.  We understand that the Trinity is a profound mystery that far excels the power of human telling.

In our Offertory Hymn for today we declare, “I bind unto my self today the strong name of the Trinity . . . his hand to guide, his shield to ward” In saying this we are declare that we put our whole trust in His grace and love.  We do not understand this naïvely.  Sometimes difficult things happen to individuals and to parish families, but we also understand that part of the sovereign work of the Trinity is to make sense out of the past as well as the present.  This Lord God of hosts, in return, declares to us, “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope, then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you.  You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 28:11-13).

Our parish name, Trinity Episcopal Church, invites us into a relationship with this God of Love and restoration.  This is not an abstract thing, but an intensely personal thing.  It is God the Father who loves us.  God the Son is our Friend and Redeemer. It is God the Holy Spirit who offers us the power to rebuild our lives and our parish on a firm foundation as we worship and celebrate His love together.

The Tyranny of Perfection

Have you ever noticed that the most beautiful people don’t have perfectly regular faces?  That kind of regularity of perfection is an aberration because it flies in the face of the infinite variety of God’s creation.  One reason why we will recognize each other in the heavenly kingdom is that even when we are ‘perfected’ we will be as different as snowflakes.

That doesn’t stop us from applying an arbitrary standard of perfection on the rest our experience.  We, who are ourselves imperfect, impose the expectation of perfection on family and friends, on our jobs, our homes, our automobiles, and on our Church.  Nothing you know will be perfect in that abstract and bloodless sense of perfection.  You, yourself, are not perfect, and it doesn’t take much living to discover that others are not perfect either.  All of our jobs have a drawback somewhere or other.  Our homes are not perfect, the weather and wear will see to that.  The new car smell always wears off.  The Church is not perfect either.

Rather than expect an abstract standard of sinless and spotless perfection, consider the biblical words most often translated as ‘perfect’.  Both in the Old and New Testaments those words emphasize the qualities of maturity, completeness, and balance.  The Church is charged with building up the saints so that they may reach mature manhood, the measure and of the stature of the fullness of Christ (Eph. 4:11-12).  It is not charged with producing righteous robots who never make a mistake.  When you think of that, it is actually a tremendous break.  It means that there is space for all of us as we grow together in love and maturity.

If seeking perfection in creation is fruitless, on what should we place our expectation?  There is One who is perfect.  St. James tells us that, “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.”  It is God Himself who changes not, and those who put their trust in Him will not be disappointed.

As for other things, extending God’s mercy and grace to all of our human experience, we should set our attention on “whatever is true, whatever is honourable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, whatever is excellent (Phil. 4:8).  Jesus, who is the way, the truth, and the life, is the source of all wisdom, truth, and beauty, and those who follow Him strive to work out those qualities in their own lives and experience.  While an abstract standard of perfection is not within our grasp, love for others is, joy in God’s creation is; and when we let go of unrealistic expectations, peace of mind and heart is also within our grasp.